Searching for Answers (and Yoga Jokes)

For lack of anything better to write about today, I decided to look up some interesting facts about yoga.  After several minutes of websurfing, I found absolutely nothing.  I guess yoga just isn't that interesting.  However, I did find something much better: yoga jokes!  Everything is better when it's turned into a joke (or at least, almost everything).  Here are a few I found:

What did the yogi say to the hot dog vendor?
Make me one with everything!

What did the sign in the window of the yoga master searching for a new disciple say?
Inquire Within

And my personal favorite:
Why did the yogi refuse anesthesia when having his wisdom teeth removed?
He wanted to transcend-dental-medication!

So, overall, it was a successful browsing session.

Certificate of Authenticity

Today is day three of my yoga experience.  I think that's plenty of time to consider myself an official "yogi" (one who does yoga).  For those of you who have not discovered the benefits of 24-hour yoga, you might think that three days is not nearly enough time to make it official.  However, I implore you to consider how much time I have actually spent practicing yoga.  If I started three mornings ago, and it is now noon, my time spent doing yoga can be calculated to approximately 60 hours (because I do yoga even in my sleep with the deep breathing and all that).  That's a lot of yoga.  Therefore, it is official.  Despite being such a large number of hours already, there is more.  Although I just recently discovered that everything is yoga, this does not mean that I am new to yoga.  In fact, since I'm still doing the same things today that I did as a youngin', you could say that I've been doing yoga all my life!  And that's a whole myriad of hours.  So there you have it, folks. I'm a true yogi.

The Secret to Happiness

Today was a magical day. 

Today I had no stress...  None!  Despite projects, quizzes, and homework assignments galore, I remained calm and relaxed in the face of what would otherwise have been an impending doom.  Ordinarily I would complain about everything I had to do and how little time I had to do it all, but today I shut my mouth and sailed through the day with an insouciant manner.  Those of you who know me may be in shock.  Others of you may not believe what you're reading at all, but it's true.  Today was a stress-free day!  Of course, it wasn't truly stress-free, but I closed my eyes and made it so.  How did I do it, you may ask?  Well, the answer is simple: yoga.  Refer back to yesterday's blog post and you'll discover my secret: the knowledge that everything is yoga!  With this brand new discovery, my life has become at least four and a half times calmer.  Making life one big giant yoga party is most definitely the secret to happiness.  :)

Great News!

I've been lying to myself for quite some time now, saying silly things like, "I'll start doing yoga tomorrow," or "I'm ready to change my life."  Well, as it turns out, I've actually been lying to myself about lying to myself.  In fact, for these few months that I've been procrastinating the beginning of my yoga journey, I actually have not been procrastinating at all!  I always thought of yoga as this sort of destressitizing, calm, and planned hobby.  However, for all intents and purposes, this isn't the case.  I have now decided that yoga is simply the flexing and stretching of muscles, which just happens to be relaxing (usually).  Guess what this means:  I've been doing yoga every day!  When I wake up in the morning, I stand up and stretch.  Yoga!  When I try to retrieve the box of cereal from the tippy top shelf, I stretch my calf muscles.  Yoga!  When I get to my locker in the morning, I reach down to pick up my books.  Yoga!  Need I say more?  God, I'm destressed already.